Sinto Muito,
Me Perdoe,
Te Amo,
Sou Grata (o)!
Hoʻoponopono (ho-o-pono-pono) is an ancient Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness. Similar forgiveness practices were performed on islands throughout the South Pacific, including Samoa, Tahiti and New Zealand. Traditionally hoʻoponopono is practiced by healing priests or kahuna lapaʻau among family members of a person who is physically ill. Modern versions are performed within the family by a family elder, or by the individual alone.
Polynesian Antecedents
In many Polynesian cultures, it is believed that a person’s errors (called hara or hala) caused illness. Some believe error angers the Gods, others that it attracts malevolent Gods, and still others believe the guilt caused by error made one sick. “In most cases, however, specific ‘untie-error’ rites could be performed to atone for such errors and thereby diminish one’s accumulation of them.”[1]
Among the islands of Vanuatu in the South Pacific, people believe that illness usually is caused by sexual misconduct or anger. “If you are angry for two or three days, sickness will come,” said one local man.[2] The therapy that counters this sickness is confession. The patient, or a family member, may confess. If no one confesses an error, the patient may die. The Vanuatu people believe that secrecy is what gives power to the illness. When the error is confessed, it no longer has power over the person.[3]
Like many other islanders, including Hawaiians, people of Tikopia in the Solomon Islands, and on Rarotonga in the Cook Islands, believe that the sins of the father will fall upon the children. If a child is sick, the parents are suspected of quarreling or misconduct. In addition to sickness, social disorder could cause sterility of land or other disasters.[4] Harmony could be restored only by confession and apology.
In Pukapuka, it was customary to hold sort of a confessional over patients to determine an appropriate course of action in order to heal them.[5]
Similar traditions are found in Samoa,[6] Tahiti,[7] and among the Maori of New Zealand.[8][9][10]
Traditional practice
“Hoʻoponopono” is defined in the Hawaiian Dictionary[11] as “mental cleansing: family conferences in which relationships were set right through prayer, discussion, confession, repentance, and mutual restitution and forgiveness.” Literally, hoʻo is a particle used to make an actualizing verb from the following noun, as would “to” before a noun in English. Here, it creates a verb from the noun pono, which is defined as “goodness, uprightness, morality, moral qualities, correct or proper procedure, excellence, well-being, prosperity, welfare, benefit, true condition or nature, duty; moral, fitting, proper, righteous, right, upright, just, virtuous, fair, beneficial, successful, in perfect order, accurate, correct, eased, relieved; should, ought, must, necessary.”
Ponopono is defined as “to put to rights; to put in order or shape, correct, revise, adjust, amend, regulate, arrange, rectify, tidy up, make orderly or neat.”
Preeminent Hawaiian scholar Mary Kawena Pukui wrote that it was a practice in Ancient Hawaii[12] and this is supported by oral histories from contemporary Hawaiian elders.[13] Pukui first recorded her experiences and observations from her childhood (born 1895) in her 1958 book.[14] Author Max Freedom Long, who lived in Hawaiʻi from 1917 to about 1926, documented traditional hoʻoponopono as used by Hawaiian families in his 1936 book.[15]
Although the word “hoʻoponopono” was not used, early Hawaiian historians documented a belief that illness was caused by breaking kapu, or spiritual laws, and that the illness could not be cured until the sufferer atoned for this transgression, often with the assistance of a praying priest (kahuna pule) or healing priest (kahuna lapaʻau). Forgiveness was sought from the gods[16][17] or from the person with whom there was a dispute.[18]
Pukui described it as a practice of extended family members meeting to “make right” broken family relations. Some families met daily or weekly, to prevent problems from erupting.[19] Others met when a person became ill, believing that illness was caused by the stress of anger, guilt, recriminations and lack of forgiveness.[20] Kupuna Nana Veary wrote that when any of the children in her family fell ill, her grandmother would ask the parents, "What have you done?" They believed that healing could come only with complete forgiveness of the whole family.[21]
Hoʻoponopono corrects, restores and maintains good relationships among family members and with their gods or God by getting to the causes and sources of trouble. Usually the most senior member of the family conducts it. He or she gathers the family together. If the family is unable to work through a problem, they turn to a respected outsider.
The process begins with prayer. A statement of the problem is made, and the transgression discussed. Family members are expected to work problems through and cooperate, not “hold fast to the fault.” One or more periods of silence may be taken for reflection on the entanglement of emotions and injuries. Everyone’s feelings are acknowledged. Then confession, repentance and forgiveness take place. Everyone releases (kala) each other, letting go. They cut off the past (ʻoki), and together they close the event with a ceremonial feast, called pani, which often included eating limu kala or kala seaweed, symbolic of the release.[22]
In a form used by the family of kahuna Makaweliweli of the island of Molokaʻi, the completion of hoʻoponopono is represented by giving the person forgiven alei (Hawaii) made from the fruit of the hala tree.[23]
“Aunty” Malia Craver, who worked with the Queen Liliʻuokalani Children's Centers (QLCC) for more than 30 years, taught courses in traditional hoʻoponopono. On August 30, 2000, she spoke about it to the United Nations.[24]
Footnotes
^ Oliver, p. 157 ^ Parsons, p. 55 ^ Parsons, p. 61 ^ Parsons, p. 70^ Parsons, p. 151 ^ Parsons, p. 12 ^ Parsons, p. 159 ^ Parsons, p. 217 ^ Buck, pp. 405–6 ^ Handy, p. 242 ^ Pukui, Elbert ^ Pukui, Haertig, Lee, p. 61-62, 67 ^ Chai, p.47-50 ^ Pukui, Handy, p. 184-5 ^ Long (1936) p. 246-248; Long (1948), pp. 250–2, 279, 303. Though not everything in these books is traditional Hawaiian, these particular sections are authentic descriptions of hoʻoponopono. ^ Kamakau, p. 95 ^ Malo, p. 75 (English) ^ Titcomb ^ Chai, pp. 52–54 ^ Pukui, Haertig, Lee, p. 60 ^ Veary, p. 34 ^ Pukui, Haertig, Lee p. 60-80 ^ Lee, p. 49 ^ http://archives.starbulletin.com/2000/08/09/news/story9.html
Hoʻoponopono
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